Well, my dad ended up coming over yesterday with my niece’s present. It was awkward and I wish he’d have given me at least a little advance notice because I don’t like when people come over unannounced, but at least it’s done. I never did reach out to my mom about what she I wanted to do about Christmas, but it looks like she had enough forethought to send my dad on their behalf. Or she’s reading my blog – always a possibility. Either way, had my mother showed up here unannounced it would have been even more unpleasant for everyone involved, so I’m really grateful that it happened the way that it did.
In other news, I’m officially stalled at 80 total pounds lost. As I’m sure you can imagine, I have been totally not okay with the fact that the scale has been stuck.
When I reached out to my VSG friend Misty recently because I couldn’t take the scale obsessing anymore, she said something like “Yeah, it could be a rough couple weeks.” Womp womp womp. Lol It’s really so great to have friends that will always keep it real with you during this process, though. While I’ve still been watching the scale, because I know this is just part of the process my perspective about the scale has shifted dramatically. Rather than get bummed about the gains and give up and eat all the breads and go for ice cream (like I have wanted to do and would have done in a hot minute before surgery), I’m pushing forward and refocusing on what I’m putting in my mouth and when.
Besides, I only have myself to blame. I totally jinxed myself into this stall on Instagram. Oops.
What was I thinking asking for a stall?!
Ah well. I really did have a great time that night and felt amazing. After all, this journey is so much more about the number on the scale, right? For me, it’s about nights like that night, feeling like myself, feeling happy, loving what I’m wearing (polka dots are my favorite), feeling and thinking about anything other than the crazy, negative, awful things that lie in the recesses of my brain. This process is as much about experiencing life again and getting to know my true authentic self along the way as it is about losing weight and gaining health.
So, while I am frustrated about not losing pounds currently, I know that this too shall pass. In the meantime, I continue to work on figuring myself out and living the life I was meant to live.
Merry Christmas Eve everyone!